he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
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