She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
