I didn't shave. On purpose
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
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