scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Randomize
