we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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