People in love make me want to vomit
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
