Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
