The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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