lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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