And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize