i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
