Screwed.edu
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
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