I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
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