thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
