The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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