I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
