It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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