:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Randomize
