ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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