i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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