it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
