Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I look excited, but its just a facade.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize