4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
