dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize