He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Randomize
