so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I just want to make out with him forever
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I need to wash the frat house off of me
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize