Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
