I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
