Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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