I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
My liver is preforming stress tests.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
And then he peed in my hair
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