I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Randomize
