She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
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