I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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