Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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