I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Blood and glitter go together right?
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Randomize
