My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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