Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize
