Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
porn star boner night. come get it.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
