the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Help me help you realize you are a moron
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
