Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize