But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
