my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
