none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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