At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
You ruined the universe
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
