clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
