I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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