All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Randomize
