Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
