guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
