i think i have herpe
just one?
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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