I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
