I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize